I decided to go for honesty. I love how you make me feel. How you kiss and touch me. It makes me feel . . . special. And like I want to maul you, all at once. And that terrifies the hell out of me.
Thanks. I sip the water and stand up.I have to go walk Bugsy and then I’ll be right back,ana says. Bugsy is her english bulldog. He drools all over everything and I want to tell her that Bugsy doesn’t need to be let out because Bugsy is a lazy sack of shit, but I don’t say any of this because I really, really want to stop being so unkind. okay.
Do you want anything while I’m out? she asks, and it reminds me that I asked Ben to get me Fruity pebbles. I get right back into bed.No, nothing for me. thank you.Okay, I’ll be back shortly. she thinks for a minute. actually, do you want me to stick around in case you decide to call her now?
No, thanks. I can handle it.Okay, if you change your mind . . .
Ana leaves, and as I hear the door shut, it hits me how alone I am. I am alone in this room, I am alone in this apartment, but more to the point, I am alone in this life. I can’t even wrap my brain around it. I just get up and pick up the phone. I get the number from the front of the refrigerator and I see a magnet for Georgie’s pizza. I fall to the floor, my cheek against the cold tile. I can’t seem to make myself get up.
It was new year’s eve and ana and I had this great plan. We were going to go to this party to see this guy she had been flirting with at the gym, and then we were going to leave at 11:30 p.m. We wanted to drive to the beach, open a bottle of champagne together, and ring in the new year tipsy and drenched in sea spray.Planning to go trekking through the rainforest? He flashed me another grin.
He walked over to the opposite end of the stall and sifted through the hangers. He pulled out a long black suit and handed it to me. It was clearly designed for exploring a jungle. It was long and made of canvas rather than plastic, which meant it was breathable. It also had a large hood and a flap that fell across the face, with thin mesh around the eye, mouth and nose area to allow for breathing. It was more of a bee suit than a raincoat, designed for heavy-duty excursions. Perfect.My uncle runs a tour company, if you’re in search of a guide…
I barely heard him. My heart dropped as I looked at the price. I opened the wallet and fingered through the notes.Something wrong?